I wrote this a few years
back, but still find it true today. I
hope it helps you in your rhythm of life!
40,000 Mile Tune-Up
I’m turning 40 year this
year. Yikes!
I find myself taking
stock of my life: my marriage, my friendships, my vocation, what the next
20 years will be like. I ask questions like “Has my life been fruitful?”
or “Why did life turn out this way?” or “Who are my real
friends?” I’m also starting to feel my age and find
myself worrying about my appearance. Things such as: the aches and pains,
losing hair, my eyesight getting worse, etc.
And as I reflect on
these things, I recognize the feelings of insecurity, the disorientation
and the “lostness” I feel. There are days I embrace my life as it is and
even love my life. And there are days I just want to minimize it and
say, “you’ll be fine.” And there are days it feels like a mid-life crisis.
When I feel the crisis, it’s tempting to distract myself and numb
out. Though it is tempting to pretend that it’s not a big deal or “numb”
my anxious feelings, I’m coming to realize that when I don’t pay
attention to these warning lights and noises under the hood of my car, it
will be more costly in the long run.
It’s time for a 40,000
mile tune-up.
Recently, I brought in
our Honda Civic to our mechanic for a tune-up. He changed the oil, checked
and replaced the fluids, changed the spark plug, serviced the battery and
replaced the belts. It's been a reliable car but when it started making some
noises under the hood, I felt relieved and pleased to know that I can rely on
my mechanic to know what to check under the hood and how to fix it.
In the same way, I’m
recognizing the importance of a pastor, a mentor or a counselor to help me
in this season of transition. They help me take a look under the hood,
my disappointments about my relationships or how life turned out or
the insecurities I feel about the way I look. I’m a bit more at ease in the
process because I feel understood even when my circumstances don't make
sense. I also don't feel so alone in my disappointments
and uncertainties.
Perhaps
your disappointments might be different from mine. It might be
your disappointments about being single or
not having a family. Or you might feel hopeless about your destructive
behaviors. Whatever it is, a good question to ask might be “is it time for a
tune-up?”
